Not 10 minutes after I posted my last post. Someone knocked at my door, the dogs flip the f out and start barking like we are being attacked. I get to the door, screaming "shut up" at the top of my lungs (okay, I really need to be on one of those dog behavior shows, because they are not right) and it is my neighbor looking for Fat Cat. Fat Cat leaps from a dead sleep, and starts screaming "shut the f^%&^% up" at the dogs, and runs to the door. The neighbor has come to take a look at Angel's car, because the window wipers are not working right and of course we are like 20 minutes out of the warranty. Fat Cat pulls a shirt on, yells at me to put coffee on (note, I do not drink it, i make it horrible, and i get instantly irritated when I am told to make it as if it is somehow a bash against my gender) he then realizes one of his hearing aids has gone missing and starts flipping blankets around and screaming at me that one of my mf-ing dogs has eaten his hearing aid and he is out $6000.00 because my MF-ing dogs ate his hearing aid. So I put down the arsenic I was about to put into his coffee and go running in the other room, and see him standing in the middle of it waving blankets and pillows around wildly. All I can think is that if the hearing aid was in them, it has now been flipped into my Christmas tree or into the mound of wrapping paper and boxes that are still piled up in the corner and will never be found. And his antics have the dogs barking more, and he is still cussing and screaming and flaying about. I ask him what he has checked and he claims he has checked it all, and of course, it is not to be found because the dogs ate it. (seems he must have a fear of this actually happening, because they are always to blame when one cannot be found) I start going through the blankets (slowly, and carefully, hoping that the fibers are like Velcro and have held the little thing) while he grabs the trash can by his chair (i put it there so he will not have to get up and throw the wrappers of his endless ice cream treats away, well not exactly, I put it there so maybe he will hit it instead of just piling them up on the floor where the dogs will actually drag them around the house.) He is completely disgusted and is positive the MFers have eaten it and he was talking about having their stomach cut open and removing it, if the stomach acids have not eaten it. I take the trash can from him and fish through the paper plates, the wrappers, the cigarette butts, and the ashes - where low and behold I find it, covered in ashes. Yuk. I handed it to him, and he said "is my coffee ready yet?"
I had this image of him filleted and put through a coffee press but he bolted from the door before I could get the knife sharpened. He ran out and with friend started to work on the wipers, running in for coffee and the phone every so often. Shouting orders and directions on what he needs from the auto parts store. The flurry of his actions and the chaos, not helping me function well. He bolted back in telling me something else that I had to do for him, and I winced
Then he announces 'why are you being like this? I can not deal with this, I barely can talk to you. Are you trying to ruin our day together?'
I just walked away.
7 years ago