It is my home, my neighborhood, and my history. It is what I am and where I came from. Embarrassing? Yes Boring? Never

Monday, December 1, 2008


OK, I know what you all are thinking - 'what the hell, where is the crazy tales of the antics of the Barrell? Was it all calm and uneventful?' Well , of course not, and here are some of the escapades -

1. Pretty good shape Turkey Day morning, with Angel's help and a hand from Coach, 21 were on schedule for dinner, when my mother in law calls and announces two more for dinner ( her husband son and grandson ), no problem, a little shifting and we set two more places. I was just so relieved they were not bringing their dog, i could care less how many humans they bring. (note- every year my mother in law brings her own Turkey and stuffing, every year mine gets ate first, and she has her husband take theirs to their house right after dinner- this year, Fat Cat insisted I take 1/2 of hers and cut it up early -they seem to have a quiet battle over this annually)

2. Soldier walks past the stove and asks, Where are the mashed potatoes?, ahh, they would still be in the refrigerator, 15 pounds peeled and cubed earlier, but not put on the stove. Almost a fiasco, saved by Soldier. (Yes, I had a mild freak out, but not a complete melt down, dinner only delayed slightly)

3. My Brother in Law brings cooked chilled shrimp for the appetizer. They were slightly frozen still and of course this gives Fat Cat reason to complain about how inept his brother is. Soldier jumps on the band wagon and proclaims we will have to have shrimp for dessert. Fortunately this did not continue like the infamous ham incident at Easter.

4. My mother in law tells Fat Cat 'she never thought she would see the day he would be so fat.' He bit his tongue but this put him on edge with her. Then she told us that she wanted her son to buy her a new fridge for Christmas, 'not the broke son with 6 kids.' Fat Cat began looking for alcohol.

5. Number One came late, as he had to go to his wife's family for dinner first, he then regaled us with a tale of how he fell down his stairs and can no longer open his jaw, and has a lot of back pain. Translation - 'I am not working again'. We tried not to discuss the translation.

6. One of the Crack babies undressed a Barbie and was touching it inappropriately, Angel managed to get it away from him. This particular crack baby has some serious issues, and we are really starting to fear him.

7. The Sheik was with Butterfly, I think my ham may have offended him. Then I - out of some compulsive habit - hugged him when they went to leave - which I think may have freaked him out a little. Then Soldier - who is trying hard not to have a complete melt down over his sister dating the Sheik - told me the guy is missing a finger tip. As he told me 'in country, we arrest guys with missing partial digits, it ain't good.'

8. My mother in law invites Coach to go shopping with us on our annual black Friday shopping experience. What was she thinking, Coach is not one to take shopping! My mother in law was on a roll I tell you! She also saw that Zowie had brought pumpkin rolls, so she put hers in the fridge and announced not to eat hers she was taking it home.

9. We played Shanghai until late at night, laughing and joking. I won. (This I am lucky with, anything else, not so much)

10. After three hours of sleep, I get up at 4:30 and get ready for the really big day

(tomorrow's post will include, 'where are my keys?', an evening with the mayor, and the engagement.)

No comments: