Cheesy Puddin'

Sometimes I get these ideas that I am going to make some spectacular dessert that will be just awe inspiring and I will suddenly be on the news being interviewed about the best dessert anyone ever tasted and I will be humble yet brilliant and everyone will try it and it will be worshipped. And inevitably I will sabotage myself and waste about one billion dollars and like a year of my life that i do not have to loose on something that melts into a puddle. (since the last jello mold experience --- well lets just say it was so nasty the little pieces of fruit were running faster than the liquid)

So I score this recipe for a cheese cake that sounds (as they always do, those sirens) amazing, and i get a loan for the ingredients (despite a serious stomach volcano whilst shopping- ick to the grocery store restroom).

I get the thing made, 2 hours of prep, maybe a slight exaggeration, and place it in my brand new spring form pan, in a deep pan of boiling water and balance the whole boiling goopy mess into my oven at 325 for 40 minutes. I go back to my recipe and note that it was supposed to be 1 1/2 cups of sugar not 1/2 cup of sugar! OMG! I run into the kitchen yank open the oven, grab my mits and carefully lift the spring form pan out of the boiling water past the oven door and wap it into the stove because i could not manage to raise it the 1 millionth of an inch more it would take to clear the stove. So about a cup of the golden goo splashed all over the place. Then in my brilliant mind i can take the cup of sugar I forgot and mix it in , post assembly of the cheese cake. I am not sure why i thought this was okay, but since the TV crew was not filming me at the moment, i guess I thought it okay. so I mixed it in carefully with a teaspoon and convinced myself that it was still going to be amazing.

I put it back in the oven, reminder to all, if your oven mits get wet the heat goes right through to your hands and you have to start like cussing so you do not drop your cheese cake. but you will slosh some on the oven door which will burn off later.

I go back to the recipe to read about what to do when my 40 minutes were up, and i realize the 1 1/2 cups of sugar was TOTAL sugar. 1/2 cup in the cake and 1 cup for the topping. DAMN IT. Well, i am not giving up now and i let the stupid cake bake and of course, the 40 minutes is not enough and i bake it 20 more minutes and it looks okay.

It is supposed to stay in the fridge for 4 hours or overnight, and i just figure that 3 hours is good enough and i yank it out and un-springform pan the thing. And I read the recipe which says to put the cup of sugar on top and then put under the broiler. Which is all good, and I do that when I notice that i was NOT supposed to unspringform the stupid thing. (Damn it, foiled yet again by that whole reading the recipe thing) and it begins to melt all over the broiler, then i yank it out, flinging chunks of cheese cake about the kitchen.

I scrape the entire thing in a bowl. Cheese Puddin. Not bad. Little gritty maybe.