I Got Your Tip, Buddy

HIM: He gets a roll of those things, you like , those saga-deas, that isn’t right, what are those things?
ME: I am not sure what you are talking about.
HIM: Those things you like they are round…
ME: Quesadilla’s?
HIM: Yeah, that is them, he gets a roll of Quesadilla’s.

The salad comes.

HIM: Now, this is how you should get salad dressing, in this gravy boat thing! Perfect , I hate those places where you get an entire head of lettuce for a salad and they give you a paper thimble full of dressing. And you have to say, ’can I have 8 more of these please?’ , I mean what are they thinking,
ME: So why does he take Quesadilla’s to the bar? I don’t understand
HIM: So he can leave them as a tip for the bar maid
ME: He leaves a chicken Quesadillas as a tip for the bar maid?
HIM: What the hell are you talking about? He leaves them as a tip, they are money, just different, he goes to the bank and gets a whole roll
ME: Quesadillas are rolled up appetizers
HIM: That is what you f&^^%&^%ing call them, you are the only person that calls them f^%&^ing Quesadilla’s, you had a ton of them from the G^%&^D*&^%^^^ post office machine
ME: Do you mean Sacagawea?
HIM I don’t know, it is what you f&^%&^%ing call them, the coins
ME Sacagawea -- Quesadilla’s are food
HIM I do not know what the f^%$^%$^ they are, I told you the coin, those gold coins
ME You never said a type of coin,
HIM Well I never said he takes a chicken roll to the bar to give the waitress

Dinner comes

ME So I was at work and I had just talked to Tank on the phone and I put it my pocket, and I was leaning against some shelves trying to get the numbers off these parts
HIM I don’t think Sacagawea’s are rolled up, I think they are flat, with cheese in them, I think you made them once
ME I made Quesadillas once and yes , I made flat ones but I was thinking about the ones you buy that are pre-made -- wait, you are not going to drag me into this again, let me tell you my story. So these are metal shelves and there are some wires and I am trying to not get too dirty or hurt myself. And I get shocked, like bad, I screamed really loud and jumped back. And then I was shocked again like someone tazered my butt.
HIM Someone tasted your butt?
ME Tazered, shocked
HIM oh
ME Anyway it was my phone, it was on vibrate and I thought I was getting shocked
HIM Great, people were staring at you, weren’t they?

The check comes

ME I think I am going to leave a chicken Quesadillas as a tip.
HIM What?